So I took MY QUICKLY DEVELOPING WHORE out to suck some random cock tonight at the glory holes in Portland. We are here on vacation, and as promised, she has at least attempted to suck anonymous cock through a hole in the wall every day we’ve been here. Good little fuck.
What happened in the booths wasn’t all that exciting. A lot of limp, smelly dicks if you really want to know the truth. It’s what occurred to us, for the second time, that I want to tell you about. We went to the nearest, most convenient adult shop that also had glory holes in their viewing booths. I think only half-a-dozen companies in Portland allow this, and they are spread out. Plus, their state of cleanliness varies. We didn’t choose to go to this particular place because it was clean – it generally isn’t. We also didn’t go because it’s filled with horny straight men just waiting to get their cock sucked through a hole in the wall. Wish those were the reasons, but they aren’t. Instead, we went because it was close. Perhaps the amount of effort expended is the direct result of our bad time. Or maybe people are just becoming stupid assholes.
We went to Taboo Video. The last time we went to this particular location nothing happened. We weren’t asked for our identification and we didn’t see a single cock come through the hole in our booth. Last visit we decided to go to their other location, also called Taboo Video, further out on the edge of town. It was there we had the idiot behind the counter act like MY LOVE was a potential hooker, by asking for our identification only when we were about to step into the viewing area. Perhaps that should have served as a warning to us, but we thought that particular clerk on that particular night had handled it poorly. Turns out things are stranger than we could have imagined.
Tonight we entered and I asked politely if I could use the restroom. Maybe this is some sort of secret sign to them, but after working in porn shops for many years I can say that asking to go to the bathroom is not a suspicious act. You might be nervous the person using it will leave a mess, but that’s as far as it goes. When I came out, MY LOVE wanted to step over and have a quick look at the lingerie – again, not a suspicious or prostitute-like act. Maybe it was the blatant hand-holding we were doing as we walked toward the entrance to the viewing area that gave us away. The female clerk asked us to stop and show our identification. I pulled my passport and MY LOVE’s driver’s license out of my jacket pocket and didn’t say a word. I could just feel MY LOVE getting wound up next to me. When the clerk asked her to say my name she only said my first name, knowing exactly what was needed of her. When the clerk persisted she said my last name.
I want to stop here and mention how truly fucked up this is. There was a girl standing ten feet away, trying to purchase something. There were men in the viewing area that could certainly hear us, and there were men walking in the door that was only a few feet behind us, even as we spoke. NOBODY in that fucking store needed to know our full names, but because of this nitwit we were telling everyone who we were. Last time, I’d only walked away miffed, shouting a few random nasty words as I moved on with my night, but tonight I wasn’t about to let it go. I quickly spat out MY LOVE’s name and then said a few things. I began by telling the clerk how clumsy she was about the whole process and before I knew it MY LOVE was putting in her valuable many-cents-worth. When asked to explain this policy – why were they asking only a male/female couple going into the arcade to go through this stupidity? – we were told that it was for the safety of the females that went back there. She claimed there had been complaints from women and that by simply knowing my name, and MY LOVE’s name, she would be safe from harm. Like magic! This fascinated me, and I did try to get her to explain, but by then we’d certainly made our point. The clerk offered to put me in contact with the manager, but I told her I’d prefer she communicate our anger about the situation to him, and maybe mention that the policy was pretty stupid and kind of illegal.
You are singling out people – a man and woman going into the viewing area – and that is discrimination. You are assuming only women can be prostitutes, which is either REALLY STUPID or SOMETHING YOU ARE KNOWINGLY IGNORING. They claim to want couples to come in to their establishments but they do so very little to actually make it happen. The arcade was filled with gay and transvestite porn, which doesn’t attract many straight people. The booths are always dirty which does not attract women or clean men. The clerks are rude and have zero knowledge of the industry they are in, which usually pisses everybody off. They’re basically there to make sure nobody steals, ring up purchases, and only check the identification of couples going into the viewing booths.
Why were we not asked for our identification when we walked in the door? Why could the simple little clerk not just come out and admit that she was checking to see if MY LOVE was a hooker? To my surprise, MY LOVE called and spoke to the manager who, long story short apologized, but said that no policy existed that told the clerks to specifically ask couples walking into the viewing booths for their identification, to establish if the female is a prostitute. He seemed to think it was just coincidence that the same thing was happening, several weeks apart, at different locations. That, my friends, is just a sad lie. MY LOVE told the man that what he was doing was against the law, and she even went as far as to say that next time we come in we’ll be carrying recording devices, so if it happens again we can do “something” about it. I don’t want any part of that, I just want the people who work in and run adult businesses to get their shit together.
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We have a new fan from Japan who wrote and asked about purchasing our entire video catalog. He literally wants everything we have done so far. Through a few e-mails we decided that he should buy all of the DVDs we have on our site, and then go through the Clips4Sale stores later and download what he doesn’t have.
During our correspondence, our new fan made it clear that his English isn’t so good. We haven’t had any problems communicating, but there was a problem when he eventually placed his order. Right now we only have 16 DVDs at ruinouslove.com, and at roughly $25 each, I was expecting to bring in around $400 from his order. So, when the bill was nearly $500 it came as a bit of a surprise. Turns out he ordered the same movie - “The Long Weekend” - six times because we offer six choices on what the artwork on the disc can look like. Basically, he ordered all six discs, and I’m certain he didn’t know it. To make up for this, he is getting four DVDs that haven’t been released yet, and one compilation of my choosing. When I explain what happened I’m sure he will be thrilled to have movies that nobody else has, and that will easily make up for the confusion. He’s definitely getting more for his money then he would have if he’d been paying full price for the unreleased DVDs. Each copy of “The Long Weekend” is only $22, but the unreleased movies will be a bit more than that. So it’s all going to work out just fine.
I will be spending the day burning copies of every damn movie we’ve made, and printing up the disk inserts, so that we can ship his order first thing tomorrow morning. If he likes what he sees – and I don’t know many stories of disappointment yet – he’s promised to order the a whole lot more. Fans like these, we need.
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MY LOVE writes:
***After a not too relaxing vacation (as you have most likely read about) it was time to get things back to normal and help MY MAN get over the remnants of his cold. Hence I declared yesterday "Happy Butthole Day!"
Cute pink and black corset with matching mini skirt, stripper heels and a clean butthole was just the start...***
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We have been gone for over a week, on what was supposed to be a vacation. It was neither relaxing, nor much fun, which is a big part of what vacations are supposed to be, but some of that was unavoidable.
Shortly after arriving in Portland, I began to cough pretty heavily, and before the trip was over I was experiencing a full-blown cold/flu. Body aches, fever, coughing, stuffy head, etc. For three days I wanted nothing more than to sleep, or sit by the warm fire and just ache. My stomach did not want food but I knew I had to eat, and everything I did consume tasted horrible. As bad luck would have it, MY LOVE wound up with what must have been food poisoning, so on one of the mornings I was feeling miserable she was vomiting and feeling pretty punk herself. We’re both home, and only now are we starting to feel “normal” again. My illness probably lasted a good five days and MY LOVE did not feel well for about three of them.
It felt like we spent very little time together. MY LOVE seemed to be off doing errands, or working out and hanging out with her mother a great deal. They rarely get to see each other so this must have been a wonderful treat for the both of them. It did not help that, even when we were watching a movie together, we were technically held apart by distance – no couch in the T.V. room, just chairs. We did spend a good part of one day shopping together, and we got to see a concert on the night before we came back home, but that’s about it. I think we ate out twice – I didn’t want to sit in a restaurant feeling miserable, or waste money on food I wasn’t going to be able to eat – and just spent a lot of time quietly doing nothing. This might have been relaxing if I hadn’t been ill, and MY LOVE might have enjoyed it more if, frankly, I hadn’t been ill. On top of all of this, I only crawled into bed with her at night and spent maybe 3 or 4 hours next to her before waking up in a sweat and having to move to a different bed. I tossed and turned, and coughed throughout the night, and she would have never gotten any rest if I had stayed in the bed with her. We missed each other during our vacation – it was very strange.
We managed to get a couple days of glory hole adventuring in before my sickness got too severe, and you’ll be hearing about that later. We wound up staying in two different places, so I had to load and unload our vehicle a number of times. So many that I hated doing it when we finally got home. Once again, we were without internet service, and this time it was even more difficult to find wireless access somewhere. When I finally did, I was feeling so terrible that I just decided to lay down and sleep for a while, and when I woke up it was time to go get MY LOVE from her mother’s house. Because we were both feeling gross we cancelled a photo shoot with a gentleman who has been patiently waiting to work with us. Hopefully we will finally get to meet him in April. Not a great vacation.
The highlight for me was seeing the concert, the night before we left. Tricky was amazing, even if the sound guy didn’t know how to do his job, but that’s a couple of blog posts down the road. For now we’re home, getting back into the routine, and aching to get back to sharing with all of you. Sorry we’ve been gone so long…
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Woke up today knowing that I wouldn’t get a lick of work done, and found out I was dead wrong. I did manage to get up early enough to play the drums for a brief 30 minutes, before I had to start emptying out my drum room in anticipation of the carpet cleaning guy . At 9am he would arrive and begin taking care of four rooms and three area carpets in our home. This meant taking all of the furniture that wasn’t a total pain in the ass to lift, and moving it into the kitchen or dining area, which has wooden floors. That meant disassembling my entire drum set and moving everything out of the room it was in. As of last night, I had a ton of stuff spread out on the floor, and most of it was “adult” in nature. All of the items we plan on taking with us for the shoot with Ken Marcus were on the floor, as well as half-a-dozen implements that still need to be used in upcoming scenes. Not to mention the cage that I purchased MY LOVE for Christmas, and a few other pieces of furniture designed for sensual use. We had to move things in the office, master and guest bedroom, and living room either into the kitchen/dining room area or out onto our deck. And once the guy was done, we had to move it all back.
While all this was going on, MY LOVE was cleaning the floors and dusting the furniture and countertops. It took me a while to put my drum set, and the room it is in, back together. Once that was accomplished, it was time to go outside and dig in the yard. The side of our house is overgrown with plants I can’t identify, but they apparently have to go, and I have volunteered to dig up the huge section that they have overtaken. I’m not just pulling weeds though - I am digging up the entire area. Eventually we are going to replant something that looks nicer and still gives the wildlife a place to hide, but for now all MY LOVE wants is destruction. I am happy to oblige.
All of this, and the day is almost over already. I managed to squeeze in a few more minutes of drumming, to test out my new setup, but no work was accomplished until very late in the day. There was constructive time in front of the computer, which included editing footage from our last Portland visit, and this blog post. The footage turned out better than I had anticipated. It's a 30 minute clip that will go up on Clips4Sale tomorrow, and will be one step closer to fulfilling our obligation to MauiKink. We used their Suspension Cuffs for the scene I edited, and we owe them a commercial for them too, but a snag has developed in that area. NocturneVideo, where we were posting the commercials, doesn’t seem to be running correctly anymore. Nobody has been able to put up a new clip for over a month, and the person that owns/runs the site is not returning e-mails. That means there is no place to put up the commercials we agreed to make for MauiKink – except their own site. So, we are still making the commercials and just shipping them to Hawaii instead. It’s better than nothing for right now.
MY LOVE and I will go to sleep in a clean house tonight and when we wake up tomorrow it’ll feel just a little bit different. I’ll be extra careful not to get food or coffee on the carpet and maybe she’ll knock it off with the popcorn everywhere. We can only hope.
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